


Captured

by RadarTechnician



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Multi, Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-13
Updated: 2016-03-13
Packaged: 2018-05-20 03:45:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5990695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RadarTechnician/pseuds/RadarTechnician
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You're in a dark room, no idea where you are. You can't see anything and you don't know how long you've been in there. After what seems like an eternity the room is flooded with light and there is a figure standing over you. </p>
<p>Kylo Ren.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Awakened

Your head was throbbing. Everything around you was black, you tried to focus on something, but all you could see was the outlines of objects.  _ Where were you?  _ You tried to move but your arms and legs were restricted, you began to panic, trying to force the restraints off, but to no avail and you ended up just tiring yourself out even more.  _ What happened?  _ You tried desperately to remember what happened, but thinking back just caused you even more pain.  _ How long have you been here?  _ You tried once more to move, but the restraints were far too tight.  _ fuck _ . You looked around, searching for anything that could give you an idea of where you were, but everything was too dark.  _ What did you do to get here?  _ You closed your eyes and tried to calm yourself. You thought about how thirsty you were, your throat and lips were so dry, there was a lump in your throat which you couldn’t swallow. You had no idea how long you had been here, or how long it was since you last drank something. Licking your lips you tasted blood, and there was slight pain as your tongue traced over a cut. You wondered if you had been attacked.  _ But by who? and why?  _ You had no energy, and just staying awake was a task that required all of your effort. Despite being asleep for who knows how long there was nothing else to do, and you didn’t feel anything when you slept, so you let yourself drift painfully and slowly back to sleep.

Waking up again you felt far more refreshed, your head was pounding less and your vision was far more clear. There was more light in the room, which seeped in from the crack under the door. Although, even with the increase of light there was very little to see in the room, it was almost entirely empty except a few scarce chairs. The walls were black, as was the floor, there were a few dim lights on the wall, which barely made a difference, but other than that there was no help from the room in figuring out where you were. Your neck ached from being in the same position for an extended amount of time. Infact, everything ached. You wondered if you were going to die in here, and you began to panic again. You inhaled slowly, then exhaled, your breath shaky. _Had your capturers forgotten about you?_ Part of you hoped they had, but the other part decided you wouldn’t want to die slowly, forgotten about in a dark room. Halfway through your thought the door opened, the room flooded with light, causing you to wince from the sudden change. There was the sound of footsteps, and then silence.

“You’re awake” A distorted voice startled you. You tried to talk but your throat was too dry causing you to cough. 

“Whe-Where...” You pause to cough “...am I?” The figure stepped closer, you got a clear look at them as your eyes adjusted to the new light. They were dressed entirely in black, they had long black robes, black leather boots and a mask that covered their entire face, all hiding any traces of who could be under it all. But you knew. You knew from the rumours. It was Kylo Ren.Just thinking of his name struck fear into you. The stories you heard about him, his ruthlessness, his anger, his tendency to kill with the slightest trigger. You were almost certain you were about to be killed.

“You don’t remember?” The voice broke your thoughts. You shook your head slowly, looking away from the tall figure inching dangerously close to you. He raised his hand towards you, you flinched back as much as you could, fearing what he’d do. Nothing seemed to be happening until you felt a sudden pain in your head, you let out an inaudible gasp. Your head felt as though it was on fire. You realised he must be using the force on you, you had heard stories of how he could do all sorts of things, such as mind reading.

“Mm.” He sounded content, although it was hard to tell with the distortion of his voice. “So you really don’t remember?” He asked rhetorically, already knowing the answer. You continued to cough, unable to say anything. Kylo gestured to one of the guards standing at the door, who then nodded and left hastily. A few moments later the guard returned with water. They handed it to Kylo who pressed it against your lips. You were hesitant at first, refusing, but then came to the realisation that poison was not the kind of thing Kylo would do, he definitely prefered a much more... bold way of killing, your thirst was too hard to resist anyway and so you drank  the entire thing. Water had never tasted better to you, you had to contain a sigh of relief. “Thank you” you managed to whisper. The guard was gestured at again and they left room leaving you and Kylo alone together. Kylo paced around the room slowly, taking a few glances at you once a while, as though expecting you to say something. There was a long silence before he finally said something. 

“What is your name?” 

“[Y/N]”

“What is the last thing you remember?” 

You thought about it. Thinking about it still caused you slight pain, but you were too scared to refuse to try, the pain he would cause you if you didn’t answer would be far greater than this anyway. You closed your eyes and focused. Hard. A few memories returned to you slowly. You remembered being hot, everything was hot. Everything was burning.   

“Fire, I think… Nothing else” 

“Then let us keep it that way” You wanted to protest, ask what was going on, but restrained yourself.

 

The calmness of the entire situation surprised you, the stories you heard were not as accurate as you once thought, he didn’t seem to be angry, or seem to have any urgency to kill you.  _ Not that you weren’t grateful, you were… but just confused as to why you were still alive.   _ “You can be of use to me” the voice broke your thoughts again. You realised he must have read your mind for the second time. You made a quick mental note to be more careful about what you think when around him.

“U-Use?” You trembled. “How…?” 

“You will be my assistant. You will get me what I want and when I want. You will sort everything out, such as ensuring everything is tidy and in order.” 

“Why? I’m not a threat to you, I don’t remember anything. Can’t I just leave?”

You watched his hand grip onto his lightsaber and you instantly regretted your question, he leaned in closer to you and towered over you.

“That was an order,  _ do not _ question my decision” You could feel the anger radiating off of him. You nodded quickly, the colour draining from your face. “You will address me as Sir from now on. Do not ask questions, do not speak to me unless told to.”

You had so many questions,  _ Why were you here? Why did he want  _ **_you_ ** _ specifically to do this? Why couldn’t you leave?  _ But you decided you wanted to live and chose not to ask.

“Yes, Sir”

“You will continue to be monitored so I can ensure you will not attempt an escape.”

_ Monitored? You’re a slave-prisoner now?  _ You thought about resisting but once again decided working for him would still be better than death. 

“Yes, Sir”

Kylo reached forward and unstrapped the restraints around your wrists and ankles, the relief was overwhelming. It was short lived though. 

“Shackle them” Kylo said to the guard. The guard walked towards you and tightened shackles around your wrists tightly. The restraints were even tighter than before.  _ How will you work for him with these around you constantly?  _ “These will remain on for the foreseeable future, do not attempt to remove them.” You took a step forward and collapsed to the floor. You realised you hadn’t walked in a really long time. “Up” Kylo demanded. you struggled to stand up, your ankles collapsed underneath you. “UP” He said again, this time with an increasing sense of impatience. You tried to get to your feet but your ankles were not going to support you.  

“I can’t, Sir” There was a long sigh before you felt strong arms around you as you were picked up off the ground by Kylo, he carried you in his arms. You could feel his chest against you, his soft breathing and his heartbeat. This reminded you that he was human, just like you. He passed you to the guard, and you were almost disappointed, you somehow enjoyed being in his arms. You felt protected. Realising your thoughts could be read at any moment you quickly dismissed it. Kylo left the room and you were carried by the guard who followed him. 

 


	2. Routine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaa sorry it took so long, I was super busy. I will try and do updates a lot more regularly! Also excuse the shitty chapter titles, I have no idea what to put for them :^)

As you entered his room you were taken back by the size of it. It was so large it could fit  _ at least _ 4 people comfortably, he even had a separate room for his bed. The guard who had been carrying you stopped in the doorway. He gently lowered you down, still holding on to you firmly. You nodded to him, letting him know you would be able to stand on your own now. Kylo moved closer towards you. He gestured towards various places around the room explaining each part, and informing you on what would need to be done in that area. Once you had the general idea of the place you were told to start tidying immediately. Kylo left and you were alone with a guard who seemed disinterested in anything you were doing, and more interested in what was going on outside the room. Glancing around there wasn’t much that seemed to need work. You went to one corner of the room and started neatening up a pile of books, and then into another corner to do the same. You noticed how everything was black, or at least a dark shade of gray, the floors were so shiny that you could see your reflection in it. There was no colour anywhere, even his bed was black. You went closer to his bed, it looked so comfy, your hand tentatively brushed against the sheets, feeling the silk between your fingers. You had to restrain yourself from lying down on it.  _ How long had it been since you’d been on a proper bed? _ You redid the sheets and arranged the pillows. Once you felt like you had finished you took a step back and made some final adjustments. You were even more exhausted than before, it had taken far longer than you thought it would, but everything was perfectly arranged giving you a strange sense of satisfaction. You wondered what you would have to do tomorrow, everything was as clean as possible and Kylo didn’t seem like the type of person to spend much time in his room. You thought about the possibility of being assigned a new job. 

 

As you were about to tell the guard you were finished you heard fast approaching footsteps. The hooded black figure pushed past the guard and with one quick gesture his lightsaber was out. The sight of it sent shivers down your spine, you’d never seen anything like it before, it was strangely beautiful, its vibrant red glow powerfully contrasted with the ubiquitous black, making it impossible to focus on anything else. Awe soon turned into fear as he began driving the lightsaber through everything in sight; the books you had spent ages organising were discarded and burnt on the floor, the furniture you spent neatly positioning was upturned. Any doubts you had about his ferocity returned and you found yourself frozen, you watched as the place was torn apart. The guard quickly grabbed your wrist and dragged you out from the room. _ What was going on? What made him react like that? Does this happen a lot? _

 

“This is where you will be staying from now on” The guard informed you. You hesitantly stepped into the cell. The guard closed the door and locked it. “You will wait here until tomorrow morning when you will continue your duties”. The cell was barely furnished, your basic needs were attended to. The walls were grey, much like everything else. You lay down on your bed and stared at the blank ceiling. Your hands were still shaking from before and you had to sit up again. You tried to deepen your breaths to calm yourself down, but you couldn’t stop yourself from thinking about it. You got up and paced around the room, your breaths shaky. You couldn’t control your thoughts. Taking one final deep breath you sat down on your bed. You told yourself repeatedly that everything was ok.  _ Everything was not fucking okay.  _ You told yourself that he wasn’t going to hurt you.  _ You’re going to fucking die.  _ Your thoughts ran wild until you finally passed out from exhaustion.

 

You woke up to an angered voice alerting you it was time to work again. _ Great.  _ You realised you must have had less than 4 hours sleep. Dragging yourself out of bed you felt like you were about to collapse, but you forced yourself to stay awake. You followed the guard, who led you to Kylo’s room. You were not looking forward to the mess you had to clear up, it would surely take twice as long as the previous day. As you entered you noticed him. Kylo ren. He was hunched over his desk.  _ Why was he still here? _ You froze again. You were nudged forward by the guard, forcing you to move. You began to tidy as far away from him as possible, but the most damage was in the area closest to him. Your tidying became closer and closer to him, until you could hear his distorted breaths. He was staring at his hands. Even without seeing his face you could tell how troubled he was. Before you even knew what was happening you found yourself whispering to him. “W-What happened?” The sound of your own voice shocked you, your voice was laced with sympathy and fear. At first he seemed to have no reaction, but he slowly lifted his head. He stared directly at you. You felt yourself become pale, flashbacks from the night before flickered in your head. He looked back at the damage he caused. 

“Sorr-” His voice cut off. Before you even had time to comprehend what was said he left the room. You watched him, his cape cascading gently behind him. You resumed your tidying, your thoughts remained silent for a brief moment.  _ Wait- Did. Did Kylo Ren almost say sorry?  _ You stood still again, frozen by this. You couldn’t help yourself from smiling. 

“Prisoner!” The guard’s voice broke your train of thought. You finished tidying the room, which took just as long as you predicted, you were surprised you hadn’t passed out yet. 

 

You reached your cell and lay back on your bed. You stretched out your arms and rubbed your temple. Looking at the ceiling you tried to think back to before you were captured. You pushed yourself to remember. There was a boy, he was crying, after that everything was hazy. You continued to try and remember more but you felt a searing pain in your head and your memories came to a standstill again. All you remembered was a fire and a boy. You had no idea what this meant, you were just grateful you remembered one thing.

 

You were woken up again by one of the guards. As you began to get up the guard stopped you. “You are not required to do your duties for a few days, as Kylo Ren will not be returning to his room for a while.”

“Where is he?” You asked. 

“Out” and with that the guard left. 

 

The next few days dragged on. It was the same day after day. At first you were relieved to not be on duty, but being stuck in the same cell for such an extended amount of left you longing for an escape. Sleep, eat, think. Sleep, eat, think. It had been a painfully long week and yet you hadn’t remembered anything new and there was still no news indicating when Kylo would return. You went to your bed, shut your eyes, attempting to remember for what felt like the thousandth time. “Your duties will be resumed tomorrow” The voice startled you and you lost concentration, but it didn’t matter, you were excited. Sick of the routine, any change to this was good. 

 

You thought things would be better after going back to tidying every day. You were wrong. You were stuck in a routine again. Everything the same. You would wake up from the rock hard slab (called a bed), reposition every  _ single _ object in Kylo’s room, eat the same disgusting meal and sleep. For weeks. Nothing changed. You barely saw Kylo, and when you did you felt nothing in particular, you were no longer as terrified as you were the first times you saw him. You wondered if you’d be stuck in the same endless nightmare forever. 

 

When you were woken up again you were told that Kylo Ren had had another outburst. 

You followed the guard to Kylo’s room. You rolled your eyes at the mess. This was going to require all your energy. Taking a deep breath you set to work. Lifting up the chairs that had fallen, clearing up any torn pieces of paper and removing the smashed glass from the floor. Hours passed and you still weren’t finished. The guard became more and more agitated. After another 20 minutes the guard became too tired. “That’s it. Wait here, someone else needs to come and watch you.” The guard left to get another guard to monitor you. You considered this a chance to escape, but decided against it, it would be impossible with the amount of energy you had. As you entered Kylo’s bedroom to fix his bedsheets you heard footsteps, the new guard must have arrived. You crept towards the door. In the doorway of his room stood Kylo Ren. His lightsaber was drawn and he began destroying his room once again. _Two tantrums in such a short time? What had gone wrong to cause him to act like this?_ You watched intently as his lightsaber sliced into his desk. Sparks flew in every direction, he let out a loud yell as he drove it through everything. He gripped it with tenacity- Like someone was trying to steal it from him. You slowly took a step out from the room. 

“Ky-” Before you could say anything Kylo threw his lightsaber in your direction. You fell to the floor, pain shot through your side. You watched as Kylo ran towards you, he wrapped his arms around you, holding you close to him. 

“I didn’t know it was you, I got startle-” Before you heard anymore you were unconscious.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also if there are any mistakes please do tell me ;w;


	3. Medical

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AGAIN SORRY THIS ONE TOOK FOREVER! I made it longer so I hope that makes up for it ;w;

You slowly peeled your eyes open, your lids were crusted together as if stuck with glue. Your throat was completely dry and your lips were cracked. Looking around everything was spinning, it was difficult to focus on anything but you figured from the overwhelming bright lights that you were in the medical ward. You tried to sit up but your arms were restricted and you felt a searing pain in your side.  _ What had happened?  _ You vaguely remembered doing your daily duties, you took too long and then the guard went to find someone else to watch over you. Then what? You thought hard until it all came back - You had a lightsaber driven into your side.

“You’re up” You jerked to your left causing your head to spin more. The figure came nearer to you. You still weren’t able to make out who it was but they were head to toe in black and you were able to see the outline of a helmet so you were able to make an assumption as to who it was.

“K..” you croaked.

“Don’t talk.” Kylo said sternly. “Here.” Kylo passed you a glass of water. You didn’t have the strength to lift your head and ended up spilling it all over your face. Kylo took the glass from you and placed a gloved hand behind your head, gently holding it as you drank. Your vision became clearer and you were able to utter your thanks. Kylo took a seat next to you. There was a long silence as he looked at his hands. You weren’t sure what he wanted you to do, you lay awkwardly waiting for him to move. Kylo removed his glove and placed his hand on your forehead, the feel of his bare skin upon yours caused you to let out a short gasp. There was another silence as the glove was put back on and he was seated again. 

“Do you blame me? [Y/N]” You weren’t sure what to reply.  _ Sure he had almost killed you with a lightsaber, but he didn’t mean to, right?  _ “I didn’t know it was you” he continued. “I heard a noise and I was too angry to think, I...”He trailed off and put his hand on the edge of your bed and gripped the bed frame. You shook your head. Despite having your arms restrained you were able to move your hand on top of his. The action caused Kylo to jump up and back away. His hand curled inwards slightly.  _ Shit. _ Your side began to throb again causing you to wince. Kylo stood watching you for a moment before mumbling that he’d be back the next day and to get some rest then swiftly leaving. You didn’t mean to cause him to leave, it felt like you were getting closer. You pushed the back of your head deep into the pillow sighing. You lay still until you slept again.

 

Waking up you were pleased to see kylo.  _ Maybe you hadn’t fucked everything up? _ You smiled gratefully at him. You were surprised at how calm you felt around him despite almost being killed by him. “How are you feeling today?” 

“Shit, in all honesty” You moaned.

“Do you want me to get someone?” Kylo asked as he began to stand up.

“I’m happier with you.” Kylo sat back down. “So, Uh… How long have I been in here and how long will it be before I’m out?” 

“You were asleep for a few days after the... “ Kylo paused before continuing “...and you might be in here for a couple of weeks” Kylo rested his head on his hands. 

“Thank you” you whispered.

“What for, exactly?” Kylo said lifting his head.

“For staying with me”

“I’ll stay with you for as long as you want me to” You tried to hide the smile that tugged at the corner of your mouth. “Go back to sleep. I’ll be here when you wake up” 

 

Everyday throughout the week you awoke with Kylo in your room. You couldn’t help but wish you could have his company everyday regardless of whether you were wounded or not. You wondered why Kylo was being so kind towards you, it seemed so out of character. You didn’t think he did this for other people.  _ What made you so special? Could it be guilt? _ Nevertheless you weren’t complaining. Everyday it seemed you were getting even closer, but Kylo would always end up pulling away. It made it very difficult for you to get close to him. You thought about the possibility of friendship with Kylo, it seemed unlikely, but not impossible. 

 

“Hey you” A smile widened on your face as you saw him. “I feel a lot better today. Obviously still shitty, but a lot better” You continued to ramble on about how you were feeling, you stopped as you noticed his disinterest.  _ Well, he normally was pretty disinterested, but even more so today.  _

“I won’t be here tomorrow” The smile on your face faded. You nodded.

“Why not?” 

“I’m out” He replied bluntly. You decided not to push it out of him. “I will have someone else come to watch you” 

“I’m sure I’ll be fine with the medical staff, there is-”

“I was not giving you a choice” Kylo raised his voice. “Do not argue with me” His anger came as a shock.  _ What did you do to anger him? _

“I’d prefer if you left” You turned your head away from him and listened as the loud footsteps became distant. 

 

Waking up the next morning you looked to your left again and to your dismay Kylo wasn’t there. You had half expected him to surprise you. In his place was a well dressed man leant against the wall, his hair was slicked to the side, his face positioned in a scowl. He walked towards you. You had seen him with Kylo a few times, when you had asked who it was Kylo, with gritted teeth told you his name. You wondered why he chose Hux to watch over you when there was visible tension between the two.

“Morning.” He said unemotionally. You replied by giving him a reluctant smile. He leant in close to you, you could feel his breath on your neck. He tucked your hair behind your ear. “What makes you so special?” You moved your head away from him. 

“What are you on about?” you groaned. He leant back. A wry smile formed on his face. 

“Why does Ren come to see you everyday?” His hand moved over your restraints then tightened them causing you to yelp in pain. _ Why was he doing this? _

“Fuck! Stop...” His smile grew larger. Hux held your neck and gradually licked his way upwards. You tried to get out of your restraints, your already sore wrists became even sorer with each attempt to escape.

“You don’t taste special.” He said, grimacing. The general slipped off his cloak and let it flow to the floor. He leant in again and began to tug at your skin with his teeth, starting at your collarbone and moving up your neck. “I’m going to make you mine” Shivers were sent through your whole body. You struggled in your restraints again. Hux moved back once more and this time removed his shirt exposing his bare chest. His hands hovered over the buttons on yours, then slowly undid each one. You could feel your heart beating fast, you were powerless. 

“S-stop” you whimpered. Your cries only spurred him on. Hux climbed on top of you. He grasped your head and pressed his lips against yours roughly. You closed your eyes- refusing to look at him. His hands traced down your body until he reached your waist, his hands cupped your sides. He pressed hard against your bandaged wound making you scream in pain, which made him laugh. His hands moved down again and rested his hands on your hips. He pulled down. You refused to think about what he was going to do. 

 

“H-Hux!” You whispered in a final attempt to get him to stop. Only your whimpering was audible and then the familiar sizzle of a lightsaber was heard. Your eyes jolted open and you looked towards the entrance. Kylo Ren stood with his lightsaber drawn and pointed at Hux. Hux quickly put your underwear back on and clambered off the bed. Hux cautiously made his way out of the room watching Kylo to make sure he wasn’t attacked from behind. Kylo grasped the hand that was holding his lightsaber, you could see him tremble, as though he was physically restraining himself from lashing out.

“What...Were...You...Doing…?” Kylo was panting, his whole body moving up and down. 

“I didn’t mean to! I have restraints on, he forced me-” Before you could say anymore there was a loud yell as Kylo destroyed everything around you. You closed your eyes, fear consuming you again. Then everything was silent again apart from Kylo’s ragged, distorted breathing. 

“HOW COULD YOU?” Kylo threw his lightsaber in your direction, barely missing you, it hit the wall and fell to the floor, you looked at him in horror, fearful of what he would do next. Kylo stopped. He went to retrieve his lightsaber and withdrew it. You stared at him, not daring to move. Kylo moved in closer. He put his hands against his helmet and slowly lifted it off. Your eyes widened in surprise. You didn’t know what you had expected, but you didn’t expect him to be so…  _ beautiful _ . His black hair fell untidily against his light skinned face, his dark eyes were slightly swollen and red as if he had been crying, his jaw was tense and his lips were slightly curved downwards. He stepped towards you, undoing your restraints, you sat up hesitantly, quickly doing the buttons up on your shirt. Your arms were red and sore from where you were struggling. Kylo looked at your arms and then down. He took off his gloves and discarded them to the side.. Kylo carefully put his hands in yours and moved them up until he reached the marks, he gently touched them and then stopped when you flinched. 

“I need... to go-” Kylo said, still trembling slightly. He began to leave but you grabbed his wrist before he could. 

“D-Don’t leave” You pulled him in and wrapped your arms around him. You felt him tense up even more, but that didn’t stop you. He pulled your arms away and you shuffled backwards, afraid of what he would do. You see the hurt in his eyes when you back away. 

“[Y/N]” He gulped. “You really think I’d hurt you?” He leant in and cupped your face and softly stroked your cheek

“You have before” You didn’t mean for your words to come out so harshly. He looked upset by what you said. He leant in closer to you, your faces dangerously close. You want nothing more than to kiss him, he looked so concerned and worried about you. . 

“I promise I’ll never let anything happen to you again.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And, as always please let me know if there are any mistakes ^-^


	4. Ben

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually managed to do 2 chapters in a week???

When you woke up his head was rested against you, he looked so peaceful as he slept. You refused to wake him, keeping as still as possible. His hair was messily sprawled over his eyes, you moved your hand onto his face and swept his hair back. Your hand lingered over his face, your thumb slowly stroked his cheek, his skin was so soft and pale. You moved your hand up and ran your fingers through his hair, your fingers became intertwined with the tangles. You wondered how long it had been since he had slept, when he wasn’t watching over you he was on missions for the First Order, which didn’t seem like something you got much of a break from. You watched him with a smile on your face, you had never seen him look so relaxed. 

  
  


He began to stir and you quickly pulled your hand back. He jerked up and stared at you. 

“How long have you been watching me?”

You could feel your cheeks beginning to turn pink. It must have been at least an hour you’d spent gazing at him.

“Not long” you mumbled, hiding your smile. Kylo rubbed his eyes and yawned. 

“I have to leave” Kylo announced. “I hope you feel better soon” He said. He leant in and his lips were an inch away from your forehead, he backed away and stared at you for a moment.  _ Why did he stop?  _ He then put on his helmet and headed towards the exit. “Stop doing this [Y/N].”

“Stop doing what!?” You called after him but he didn’t reply. You watched him leave, helpless.  

  
  


_ Why? Why had he stopped coming to see you?  _ It was the third consecutive day that you had gone without seeing Kylo. He would normally say if he was leaving for a few days.  _ His last words seemed angry. What had you done to upset him?  _ You decided to sleep and hope he would visit you on the fourth day. 

 

It was the seventh day, the day you were to be released. There had not been any signs of Kylo. On the fifth day you were so curious you decided to ask one of the Doctors who told you they hadn’t heard anything about Kylo leaving. You knew at that point that you were being avoided. There was nothing that you could do, you had no power and your every move was being watched. You stared blankly ahead as your restraints were removed, taken out of the bed and escorted back to your cell.  _ Great. _ There was no chance that Kylo would visit you here, you wondered if you would ever be able to speak to him one on one again.. The hospital bed wasn’t the comfiest but it still made you miss it when you laid back onto the  hard slab bed. You couldn’t believe your stupidity. How delusional did you have to be to think Kylo was actually beginning to care about you?. 

“I will come back for you tomorrow and you will resume your duties” A guard monotonously informed you. Everything was going wrong. You were back in your cell, you hadn’t recovered any new memories and you had lost any chance at friendship with Kylo. 

 

The next week you fell into the same routine, you’d wake up, work and then sleep. You hadn’t seen Kylo in almost two weeks. You _ craved _ him. The closest you could get to him was his room, and everything he left his scent on. You were becoming desperate, he had been your stability for weeks and now he was gone you were lost and alone. He was going out of his way to make sure you didn’t see each other. His bed was always undone when you went to tidy, so there was no doubt he was sleeping in there every night.   _ Why was he doing this to you?  _

 

More days passed and you couldn’t bear it anymore. You were going to see him no matter the cost. You woke up and were lead to his room. You began to tidy in the main area and then you entered the bed area. You quickly scoured the room.  _ Bobby pins. Bobby pins _ . His hair was quite long so there was a chance he would have some. The thought of Kylo using them made you smile and even more determined to find some. You ran your hand under his bed and pulled out all the small pieces. You gasped as you saw one. This was your chance. You slid the pin onto your sleeve and shoved all the pieces you pulled from out the bed back in. You hastily made his bed and quickly adjusted anything that was out of place. You informed the guard you were ready to leave and you followed him back to your cell. 

 

You had waited long enough that you were sure Kylo would have returned to his room by now. You slid the pin off your sleeve and knelt in front of the cell door. You put the bobby pin in the lock and began jabbing and twisting it around. You heard a click and the door was open. You hadn’t expected it to work, you’d probably never done anything like this before, although you had no way of telling. Standing up, you slowly opened the door and stepped out. 

 

You made your way through the familiar route to Kylo’s bedroom. You stood in front of the room. You took slow steps, careful not to alert him to your presence. You reached the doorway to his bed area. Kylo was on his bed, wearing nothing but underwear, body beautifully sprawled across the bed. He had a scar on his side, in the same place as yours. The covers were discarded on the floor. His head was tilted upwards on the pillow exposing his neck. His eyes opened and you made eye contact. He slowly sat up.

“[Y/N]?” Kylo asked sleepily, getting to his feet. “What are you doing here?” 

“I..” your voice cracked and you couldn’t reply. The back of your throat became tight and you fought the urge to cry. 

“You have to leave” You got closer and closer to him. “[Y/N]!” He grabbed your wrist and tried to pull you towards the doorway. You refused. “Don’t make me force you to leave.”

“Where have...you been?” You manage to whisper. “You just left without telling me why”

Kylo takes a step closer and you inch backwards. 

“I can’t be near you anymore.” 

“But, why?” Your voice was on the brink of breaking again, and a single tear escaped.  

“I can’t hurt you like this” Kylo put a hand on your cheek and wiped away the tear. “I promised to protect you” 

“You’re hurting me by avoiding me” You put your hand over his and pulled him towards the bed. You slowly laid down, his arms either side of you. You stared into his eyes. You move your arms up around his neck and pull him in closer. You lose your fingers in his hair. His mouth pressed gently against yours, his tongue entering the seam of your lips. His lips were warm and soft. Kylo pulled away quickly. 

“You’d hate me if you knew what I did” Kylo was still close and you could feel his breath against your skin. You searched his face for answers. But nothing mattered anymore. You leant up and kissed him again, pulling down on his lip. This time the kiss was more passionate, he didn’t seem to be holding back anymore. His hand moved under your arms as he pushed you further up the bed. You slowly broke apart from his lips.

“I love you, Ben.” 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, should I do smut or just keep it as fluff? I've never written any smut before and it would probably turn out terrible :') Let me know ;w;

**Author's Note:**

> I only have a rough plan for where I want to go with this, so if you have any suggestions or anything let me know! ;w;  
> Also, if you think anything needs to be changed, please do tell me! ^-^


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